The Twitter Widow Survival Guide

Hello internet friends, I come to you today with something that I feel to be very important. With the growing popularity of Twitter and the subsequent #tweetups that come with it we are now experiencing a new social disorder: Twitter Widow (or Widower) Syndrome.

If you haven’t heard the term before it’s probably because I’m coining it right now. Twitter Widow Syndrome can be likened to March Madness Widow Syndrome which I wrote about earlier this year. Both may be identified by feelings of loneliness, temporary abandonment, annoyance, jealousy and unbridled frustration. Any combination of these symptoms in conjunction with your partner being a more than average user of Twitter may point to a case of TWS.

The difference and problem with TWS is that it is a year round, 24/7 issue. It is not a 3 week rush of crazy like MMWS is. To help comfort and aide those feeling that they may be victims of Twitter Widow Syndrome I have decided to put together a quick survival guide. Remember that every tip will not be useful or reasonable for everyone, but hopefully you will find something that can help you (or your significant other if you are the Twitterholic)

1) Create a toll system: Whenever the Tweeter in the relationship wants to update during together time have it cost them a penny or a nickel or a dime that can go towards a date night fund or something of that ilk. Charge a premium for tweets during family events or special occasions – unless of course they are tweeting about how great you (or your mother) are.

2) Do sit-ups or push-ups or jumping jacks: If you do a quick set of something every time your significant other tweets you will be in better shape in no time. You’ll feel better, look better and be awesome. It’s a quick option that you just might find you end up loving.

3) Find an anytime hobby: Something that you can pick up and put down the same way your partner picks up and puts down Twitter. Write your opus little by little. Play with drink recipes (this one can be really fun). Try scrapbooking. Practise your tiddly winks or Jacks skills. People still play those games right, it’s not just me?

4) Keep track of these moments and trade them in for attention later: If your tweeter is neglecting you to bust out 140 characters use it to your advantage later. Without malice of course. But gently come with a little – “remember that time…” Who knows how successful you may be with a little guilt trip action.

And finally, number 5.

5) Join: Create your own network of current friends, people you work with, folks with common interests, celebrities, etc. Go to your own #tweetups – trade them with your partner. Enjoy Twitter the same way that your TWS causing significant other does.

There you have it. 5 quick tips in a Twitter Widow Survival Guide. Try them out and see if any of them work for you or your suffering significant other.

Good luck.

creator of content, manager of community, writer, tweeter, coffee drinker. sports, comics, movies, food, music & pop culture geek. Proud MoBro.

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The Twitter Widow Survival Guide

Hello internet friends, I come to you today with something that I feel to be very important. With the growing popularity of Twitter and the subsequent #tweetups that come with it we are now experiencing a new social disorder: Twitter Widow (or Widower) Syndrome.

If you haven’t heard the term before it’s probably because I’m coining it right now. Twitter Widow Syndrome can be likened to March Madness Widow Syndrome which I wrote about earlier this year. Both may be identified by feelings of loneliness, temporary abandonment, annoyance, jealousy and unbridled frustration. Any combination of these symptoms in conjunction with your partner being a more than average user of Twitter may point to a case of TWS.

The difference and problem with TWS is that it is a year round, 24/7 issue. It is not a 3 week rush of crazy like MMWS is. To help comfort and aide those feeling that they may be victims of Twitter Widow Syndrome I have decided to put together a quick survival guide. Remember that every tip will not be useful or reasonable for everyone, but hopefully you will find something that can help you (or your significant other if you are the Twitterholic)

1) Create a toll system: Whenever the Tweeter in the relationship wants to update during together time have it cost them a penny or a nickel or a dime that can go towards a date night fund or something of that ilk. Charge a premium for tweets during family events or special occasions – unless of course they are tweeting about how great you (or your mother) are.

2) Do sit-ups or push-ups or jumping jacks: If you do a quick set of something every time your significant other tweets you will be in better shape in no time. You’ll feel better, look better and be awesome. It’s a quick option that you just might find you end up loving.

3) Find an anytime hobby: Something that you can pick up and put down the same way your partner picks up and puts down Twitter. Write your opus little by little. Play with drink recipes (this one can be really fun). Try scrapbooking. Practise your tiddly winks or Jacks skills. People still play those games right, it’s not just me?

4) Keep track of these moments and trade them in for attention later: If your tweeter is neglecting you to bust out 140 characters use it to your advantage later. Without malice of course. But gently come with a little – “remember that time…” Who knows how successful you may be with a little guilt trip action.

And finally, number 5.

5) Join: Create your own network of current friends, people you work with, folks with common interests, celebrities, etc. Go to your own #tweetups – trade them with your partner. Enjoy Twitter the same way that your TWS causing significant other does.

There you have it. 5 quick tips in a Twitter Widow Survival Guide. Try them out and see if any of them work for you or your suffering significant other.

Good luck.

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